The Origin of the Hulk
by sao21
Summary: One-shot of Melanie reflecting on her day of Hulking out.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Bunheads or anything related to it. **

The Origin of the Hulk

To say I never had a great relationship with my brother is a bit of an understatement. We've always had a bit of a love/hate relationship. To the casual observer, or really to some not so casual observers if I'm being honest, the 'love' part may seem like a bit of a stretch. Usually, we have more of a hate/'kind of tolerate because I'm blackmailing him' relationship. But unfortunately, he is my brother, so I kind of have to love him. Right? It's like the law of family, and believe me, I looked for a loophole.

Don't get me wrong, my brother does have his good points. If he wasn't such a screw up all the time, I'd have to find another ride everywhere, or learn to not be a terrible driver. It's also pretty easy to look like a pretty good kid when all I have to compete with is his dumbassery. Okay, so some of that evidence I found in his room was planted and may or may not have been pizza toppings depending on who you ask, but really, it's his own fault for always being a dipshit and doing stupid stuff often enough for our parents to believe me. So really, I'm just trying to help him learn not to be such a moron all the time.

So anyway, I see him get dumped and at first I'm like 'Awesome! Charlie's finally getting dumped and will soon know just how badly he made Ginny feel. He's such an idiot!' But then I talked to his sidekick because he wouldn't stop moping (and even told me to drive his car which is an obvious sign of insanity seeing as I don't have my license yet), and I find out he wasn't being his usual idiot self when it came to Stacia. I understand wanting to break up with him, because really no one should want to date his ugly butt, but couldn't she have just dumped him like a regular human being and not humiliated him in front of the whole school making her one of the worst people in Paradise? But no. She just had to be a crappy enough person that even my brother deserves better than her.

So when I finally see her after the revelation from Dez, she is just standing at her locker with her friends, laughing and acting like nothing happened and that she's not one of the most awful people in the world (all right, fine. That might be a bit of an exaggeration, but she's at least one of the worst people in school, if not the town). All of a sudden, my mind is filled with a red haze. And Ginny wasn't helping anything; granted, at the time, she didn't realize that there was something that she needed to help with, but that's not the point. She was just going on about crime or crime shows, or something like that. So I see that jerky ex of my brother's and all I'm hearing is pretty much 'crime, crime, crime,' so my stupid brain says "Hey Mel, why don't you do some crime?" And the next thing I know is that my brain-possessed hand is wrapping around some hair and yanking a brother-heart-crushing girl to the ground. And that's when my brain returned from its red haze to its regular crazy state, with just a hint of panic over what just happened.

I guess that means I really do love my brother, and not just in the law of family minimal requirements kind of way. Well…Crap! How the Hell did that happen? And when? As if just having Charlie as a brother wasn't bad enough, I had to realize that not only do I apparently care about his happiness, but I love him enough that I want to cause physical pain to people who hurt him.

At least it's not just my missing link of a brother who seems to instill the cray-cray in me. I also saw red after Godot rejected Michelle. I don't know what happened. She just looked so sad and uncomfortable and embarrassed, all because of a stupid boy. Maybe Michelle did just say or do something stupid, and she can fix it later. She did say it was her fault, and it wouldn't be the first time she made a mistake; she did mace us once after all. Hopefully, that's what the problem was, and the rejection was a one-time thing because Michelle really is pretty cool and deserves to have someone around who will make her happy. But either way, he shouldn't have made her look so sad. And while she looks like someone just stole her puppy, he's just sitting around laughing and smiling. Next thing I know, Godot is on the floor, his chair is in my hands, and the entire Oyster Bar is looking at me shocked and gasping. I guess I should just be thankful that no one hurt Sasha or Ginny while we were there, or Hulk Melanie may have just decided to stay until the entire town learned to never break my friends' hearts, which based on the apparent level of stupidity I seemed to have witnessed recently, may have taken years.

Maybe the super-hot unicorns are the reason I seem to be turning into the Hulk. Maybe Ginny and Sasha are right, and Paradise has to have a certain amount of discontent to function, and since the unicorns are uniting the jocks, bus drivers, kids who dress up as Star Wars characters, and pretty much everyone else in town, that frustration has to go somewhere. Hopefully, that's what is going on, and my acting like a crazy freak is providing the discontent needed to fuel society. That thought might be slightly less disturbing than me wanting Charlie to be happy, or at least not miserable (unless I'm the one causing his misery, of course). With any luck, next week, I'll be back to normal, and if I'm not, maybe I should check out that roller derby thing.


End file.
